Reflections on Harold Haizlip, The Sweeter the Juice, and the Need for Reconciliation

The following email thread was originally posted on July 17, 2018

As indicated below, I recently read about the passing of Harold Haizlip, Class of 1957.  Receiving the news about the passing of Harold Haizlip, caused me to go back into my email archive to review some of the emails I wrote during my discussion about his wife's book, The Sweeter the Juice, the story of how a number of her relatives passed for white and abandoned their black relatives for many years. 

For those who may be interested in the story and its message, I commend to you Shirlee Haizlip's The Sweeter the Juice,  For those who wonder what impact the book had on me, I commend to you the following and pray that some solace and hope is derived.

Peace,

Everett "Skip" Jenkins

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From: skipjen2865 <skipjen2865@aol.com>
Date: July 17, 2018

Received the Amherst magazine yesterday.  In the In Memory section, I read of the passing of Harold C. Haizlip, Class of 1957.  The segment reads:

Harold C. Haizlip '57

Harold's father, a Pullman porter, died when Harold was 10.  That same year Harold's grade school teacher, the sister of Dr. Charles Drew (Amherst '26 and for whom the Phi Alpha Psi house was renamed) told Harold to think about Amherst.  And he did.

Class valedictorian at the all-black Dunbar High School in Washington, D. C., Harold was one of two black students in the class of '57 and one of only eight black undergraduates.  

At Phi Psi he gave many of us insight into the black experience in America -- with compassion and, often, forgiveness.  

He graduated cum laude in Greek and Latin.  A Woodrow Wilson Fellow at Harvard, he earned a master's in classics and education and a doctorate in education policy and management.

His life was devoted to helping young people realize their full potential -- particularly the marginalized.  He was a teacher and educator, working with schools and foundations on both coasts. For eight years he was commissioner of education in the U.S. Virgin Islands,. Retired, Harold organized a free after-school arts program for more than 50,000 lower income Los Angeles students -- and was named a Purpose Prize fellow, "a MacArthur genius award for retirees."

Harold married Shirlee Taylor, Wellesley '59 -- very much Harold's equal.  She was an author (including of The Sweeter the Juice, a New York Times Notable Book of the Year), a teacher and an arts administrator.  Daughters Deirdre and Melissa sadly chose Yale.

In our 50th reunion book, Harold wrote "At some future time I will think seriously about retiring. But not today, not this week, not this month.  I have too much yet to do.  And so does America." 

Harold died of heart failure, in his sleep, on Jan. 31, 2018.  He was 82.

***

I had the pleasure of meeting Harold and Shirlee at the Black Alumni Weekend in 2011 and I led a discussion of Shirlee's book The Sweeter the Juice.  In a future email, I hope to be able to say more, but for now I, with sadness, note this passing and say "Thank You, Harold, for a life well lived."

Peace,

Everett "Skip" Jenkins

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From: skipjen2865 <skipjen2865@aol.com>
Date: April 13, 2011

Thank you, Shirlee, for your gracious comments.  I think about your book and your family story a great deal these days.  It seems to me that your story of family reconciliation may be a metaphor for what needs to happen in both this country and in South Africa.  Perhaps at this point in time, it is no longer possible to redress the grievances of the past.  Perhaps, at this point in time, the most constructive thing we can do is to reconcile with those who caused our forefathers and, even ourselves, pain.  I wonder, if it is possible, in a familial situation, to set aside the hurt for the sake of reconciliation, is it also possible for us as a people to set aside the hurt for the sake of reconciliation?

Your story, I think, shows one of the benefits that can come from such a reconciliation.  Would such a reconciliation work on a national level?
Has such a reconciliation actually worked in South Africa?  If so, why there but not here?

Everett Jenkins

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From: Haizlip
Sent: Tue, Apr 12, 2011 10:28 pm
Subject: Re: [BlackAlumni] The Quest for Reconciliation in The Sweeter the Juice and Skin and the American Civil War

Skip: I started out when I was young seeking a form of justice and contrition for my mother. As I grew from childhood to middle age  and found that the relatives in my grandfather's generation had kept secrets from the three successive generations who knew nothing of the crossover, I realized I could not hold the current generations responsible for the transgression and  sins of their fathers. And so I sought to unify a family that had been terribly shattered - and succeeded! I could not have given my mother or my children a greater gift. I could have had no greater achievement or emotional satisfaction in my own life. And I hope my story can offer many teachable moments about who we are and who we think we are. Thank you for your both thoughtful and insightful comments. Shirlee Haizlip

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On Apr 12, 2011, at 8:08 PM, skipjen2865@AOL.COM wrote:

Today is the Sesquicentennial of the American Civil War... a war that, on some points, still has not come to an end. 

Today I think about the divisions in American society that existed then and I think about the divisions that exist now... and I ponder about the very personal impacts that the social norms of the past have on each of us today.

In one of his most famous speeches, Abraham Lincoln said that a house divided cannot stand.  This statement became one of the underlying rationales for the American Civil War.  Many fought, including Lincoln, not to abolish slavery but to preserve the union.  Indeed, ostensibly, if Lincoln could have preserved the Union without freeing a single slave, I suspect he would have done so.

I think about that willingness to sacrifice the pursuit of justice when I also think about The Sweeter the Juice and Skin.  In both the book and the movie, the pursuit of justice becomes secondary to the quest for familial reconciliation.  One might fault those that engaged in this quest for not demanding more.  But, if we are to learn anything from the American Civil War, sometimes the pursuit of justice over the pursuit of reconciliation does not really achieve a lasting peace. 

Everett Jenkins

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From: skipjen2865 <skipjen2865@aol.com>
Sent: Mon, Apr 11, 2011 7:15 pm

For many years now, a mantra that has been heard in so many impoverished communities is the phrase, "No Justice, No Peace".  Usually, this mantra is meant to indicate that civil disturbances will continue until a perceived injustice has been rectified.  However, sometimes justice is not possible, or feasible.  Sometimes the hurt and the pain that has been caused runs so deep that there is no amount of penance that the perpetrator can do that will bring about justice.  Sometimes the best that can be achieved is not justice, but reconciliation. 

In both the book "The Sweeter the Juice" and the movie "Skin", families are torn apart by their own denial of the past and even their attempts to run away from the past. The resulting rift seriously impacted the lives of two young women in very profound ways. In both instances, the stories about these women, one in the United States of America, and the other in the Union of South Africa, results in a search for missing relatives.  And in both instances, the search is, to a certain extent, successful.  However, what one sees as the result of the search is not a great dispensation of justice but rather a great measure of reconciliation. 

In both the book and the movie, it is this dispensation of reconciliation that is the more important lesson not just for these two particular women but also for the two nations which gave their rather unusual stories birth.

More tomorrow.

Everett Jenkins

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From: skipjen2865 <skipjen2865@aol.com>
Sent: Wed, Apr 6, 2011 1:53 pm

According to his Wikipedia bio, these days Ken Howard serves as the president of the Screen Actors Guild.  Of particular note for fans of "The White Shadow" television series, the nickname "The White Shadow" was actually a nickname given to Ken during his high school playing days.  Wikipedia says: 

"The nickname "The White Shadow" was given to him by the Long Island press in 1961, as Howard was the only Caucasian starter on the Manhasset High School varsity basketball team."

The Wikipedia listing for Ken Howard can be found at:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ken_Howard 

As for his role as Pudd'nhead Wilson, I must confess that I never read Mark Twain's book, but the 1984 PBS production stayed in my mind because of the moral tone it brought to a story about passing.  As presented in the PBS production, those who participated in the fraud of passing a black child off as a white child were ultimately punished for their fraud in a very cruel way.

In reading Shirlee Haizlip's The Sweeter the Juice, and in watching the movie Skin, I think I secretly harbored the notion that there would be some retribution for those who engaged in "passing" to the detriment of their family members.  After all, the Pudd'nhead Wilson story had such an ending.  But the Pudd'nhead Wilson story is fiction, while the stories portrayed in The Sweeter the Juice and Skin are real life.  Sometimes when a story does not end the way you want, it may be because there is another more important lesson to be learned from it. 

I will talk about that lesson later.  It is now time for my afternoon stroll.

Everett Jenkins

Class of 1975

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From: skipjen2865 <skipjen2865@aol.com>

Sent: Tue, Apr 5, 2011 5:45 pm

Folks,

Before there was a Jeffrey Wright (Class of 1987 - Casino Royale), before there was a Laura Carrington (Class of 1980 - Lionel Richie's Hello), before there was a Larry Miller (Class of 1975 - Pretty Woman), before there was a Stephen Collins (Class of 1969 - Seventh Heaven), there was Ken Howard, Class of 1966. 

The 6'6" Ken Howard was a legendary New York basketball player who went on to captain the Amherst basketball team.  He also was a member of the Zumbyes.  However, for most folks who grew up in the 1970s, he will always be remembered for his role on the television show The White Shadow where he plays a former professional basketball player who becomes the coach of an inner city Los Angeles high school basketball team.  For many of us, it was a trailblazing show.

However, his name came to mind recently because of our discussion about passing.  My mind being what it is, it began to recall a rather outstanding performance that Ken Howard gave as Pudd'nhead Wilson in a 1984 PBS production of Mark Twain's novel.  A brief description of the novel can be found at   

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pudd'nhead_Wilson

If you read the description, I think it will be evident how it relates to Shirlee Haizlip's "The Sweeter the Juice" and to the movie "Skin".  However, I need to go for my evening stroll now.  Will talk more later.

           Everett Jenkins